Monday, January 7, 2008

No Tolerance for Old Jokes

Top Ten Observations from the 13th Annual Critic's Choice Awards:

10. D.L. Hughley is NOT funny.
I'm SO sick of the producers of these second-rate awards shows hiring token black comedians in the false hopes of entertaining a room full of stuffy white people. Having your entire schtick consist of race jokes in the year 2008 is neither humorous nor daring - it's uncomfortably tired.

9. Fergie's "Glamorous" has officilly been spent for red carpet arrivals.

8. Nikki Blonsky is adorable.

7. George Clooney is impeccably dressed, but incredibly insincere when it's not about him.
He actually looked at his watch when he presented the new Joel Siegel award to "friend" Don Cheadle. But, did you see that suit?

6. Leslie Mann is a fox.

5. Amy Ryan is an inescapable thief.
She robbed Cate Blanchett of yet another award. If she is indeed set to win the Oscar, could they just ship it to her house and have chameleon Cate impersonate her at the ceremony?

4. Javier Bardem is a fox.

3. The Broadcast Film Critics do not care about television.
Did anyone even hear the nominees that came before or after Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee in the category of Best Film made for TV? Even the announcer lady rushed through it.

2. No Country for Old Men is indeed the best film of 2007.

1. The Critic's Choice Awards is the most predictable awards ceremony in the world.

The Winners:
Best Picture - No Country for Old Men
Best Directors - Joel Coen & Ethan Coen
Best Actress - Julie Christie - Away From Her
Best Actor - Daniel Day-Lewis - There Will Be Blood
Best Picture Made for Television - Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee
Best Documentary -Sicko
Best Family Film - Enchanted
Best Animated Film - Ratatouille
Joel Siegel Humanitarian Award - Don Cheadle
Best Foreign Language Film - The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Best Supporting Actress - Amy Ryan - Gone Baby Gone
Best Supporting Actor - Javier Bardem - No Country for Old Men
Best Song - Falling Slowly - Once
Best Composer - Jonny Greenwood - There Will Be Blood
Best Comedy - Juno
Best Young Actor - Ahmad Khan Mahmoodzada - The Kite Runner
Best Young Actress - Nikki Blonsky - Hairspray
Best Screenplay - Diablo Cody - Juno
Best Ensemble - Hairspray

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